Surrendered Heart

This has been one of my favorite poems throughout the years just on what it looks like to be a woman after God's own heart. Hope you enjoy :)

Surrendered Heart

Not surrendered identity

A strength to be reckoned with.

She does not demand respect

But you want to give it to her.

Her presence invites you to rest.

In fact, she is like a tree,

Holding forth nurturing branches,

Not a spiderweb trapping you for her soul food.

Her vulnerability is so lovely

You cannot keep your soul of of hers.

She is marked by genuine kindness,

Of one who has already forgiven you for how you will fail her.

She exudes the kind of strength that trusts and waits and suffers.

As unto God's purposes,

Not her own.

She lays her life down like a lamb,

Not a dog. 

Her surrender flows from her love

Not fear or desperation.

Her surrender is a chosen thing.

She lives in the vulnerability of her longing to be treasured,

Her longing to be known,

Her longing to be invited in.

But she let her disillusionment tenderize

Not toughen her heart. 

She does not hold the object of her love captive. 

She does not make them pay

Or tie them to her with guilt

Or keep them in the terror of her critical eye,

But rather lets them fly free,

Enjoying all the more the reunion.

She lives at the mercy of no one,

She is captive only to the Father.

Thus, she is free to love,

Even if it means she loses.

She chooses doing love over getting love. 

-Author unknown 

Breckenridge, CO - Summer '12

Sin Exposed

An interesting thought crossed my mind as I was reading the other day:

The Bible does absolutely NOTHING to hide the sin of biblical characters. 

In fact, the Bible exposes sin. 

Moses: murdered a man with his bare hands.
David: a man after God's own heart, committed adultery and had Bathsheba's husband killed
Abraham: lied to Pharaoh about Sara being his wife in order to spare his own life.
Rahab was a prostitute in Jerico
Rebekah: encouraged her son Jacob to deceive her husband Isaac out of blessing his eldest son Esau
Peter: denied knowing Jesus 3 times
Judus: betrayed Jesus and handed him over to be killed.

These are just a few examples, but the bible is crawling with sin and its characters are no where near flawless. I think the reason the authors make a point to reveal the sins of its characters is first of all to show people that they are not alone in their struggles and secondly, so that we can learn from their stories.

As christians today, I think we are all so very quick to hide our sin. We're embarrassed that people might not think were "perfect" or "good christians" if they know the things we struggle with.

But that does two things to cripple the body of believers:
1. it makes christians "unrelatable" and the christian life "unattainable"
2. it hinders community and the opportunity to counsel someone who is going through the same struggles

There is not a christian out there that does not struggle with some sort of sin, so there is no need to pretend. We are all fighting the same battle, all with the same goal in mind: to make Him known.
If we expose our sin, not only will people be able to learn from it and share in it with you, but it also opens the door for the Lord to use it, change it, and redeem it.

God will take the things that cause the most shame in your life, your ugliest sins, 

He will redeem them, 

and He will turn them into ministry for you. 

Moses redeemed: God called him to lead His people out of slavery in Egypt and into the promise land.
Bathsheba redeemed: she became David's wife and the mother of Solomon (part of the genealogy of Jesus)
David redeemed: God forgave him and continued to bless him.
Rahab redeemed: Because she helped Joshua's spies, her life was spared and she too is mentioned in the genealogy of Jesus

10 Commandments of a successful relationship:

10. Do not be governed by emotions. Have a mind of Christ.

9. Seek first to understand rather than to be understood. Understanding is the first step in appreciation; appreciation is the first step in respect; respect is the first step to love.

8. Actively try to out-serve the other

7. There is no fear in love. But perfect love casts out all fear.

6. The guilt and shame you experience in relationships after doing something wrong has already been taken to the cross by Jesus and therefore there is no room for beating yourself up over them.

5. Be confident in your man's ability to lead you, trusting that his leadership comes from the guidance of the Lord. Men, lead well and you won't have to wonder if your woman is following.

4. Be the first to apologize, regardless of whose fault it is. Sincere apologies can melt hearts of stone.

3. Trust.

2. Don't assume. Most of the time your assumption is wrong and as a result it either hurts you or your loved one.

1. Above all, love each other deeply. 1 Peter 4:8

 Breckenridge, CO Summer '12

The difference between lust and love

You lust after things that are self gratifying and pleasurable. 

You love even when it means sacrifice to you.

Lust is easy. 

Love can be one of the hardest things one endures.

Lust satisfies temporarily. 

Love carries into eternity.

Lust is instilled in our sinful natures as humans. 

Love is understood only by watching our Father and through countless attempts to follow his example.

Lust places idols on the throne of your heart. 

Love allows the Lord to reign supreme and overshadow any worldly desire you may encounter.

Lust builds up walls between you and your Savior. 

Love tore the curtain and cast out all fear.

Lust brings about guilt, shame, and remorse. 

Love brings freedom, joy, and fullness. 

Choose love. Choose Christ. Choose your first Love and allow Him to transform your lustful heart into a loving one.

freedominteractivedesign.com

The Better Half

Without hurt, you would never know healing.

Without pain, you would never know comfort.

Without sorrow, you would never know joy.

Without tears, you would never know laughter.

Without battles, you would never know peace.

Without loneliness, you would never know companionship.

Without disappointment, you would never know delight.

Without loss, you would never know what it is to gain.

The good news about being in these distressing times is that you begin to get a better understanding of its counterpart, its better half. 

So do not dwell, learn.

Do not get discouraged, hope.

Do not give up, fight. 

"when times are good, be happy; but when times are bad, consider:

God made the one as well as the other."

Ecclesiastes 7:14

Nothing in this life is eternal. All the more reason to fully soak up ever ounce of a joyful moment and all the more reason not to be so distraught over an upsetting moment.

The bride wore white

I just bought my wedding dress!!!! Ohh can I tell you how incredibly excited I am!! But what is more exciting than the actual dress is the experience of buying a dress. So many styles to try on, beautiful lace, veils, hair accessories, you name it.

Staring into the mirror, looking at myself in what I was 99.9% sure was going to be what I walked down the isle in, I thought to myself, "Wow, this dress makes me look beautiful, like a real bride." As similar thoughts were streaming through my head, I began picking up on the music that was playing in the store. To my surprise it wasn't your typical "shopping experience music," but instead, it was worship. As the words continued to hit me, I began to sing.

So there I was. Standing in my wedding dress. Singing praises to my King. And that's when it hit me:

This is how Christ sees me on an every day basis.

Whether I am clean, dirty, make-up or no-make up. 

This is how Christ sees my heart. I am His bride. He has betrothed me to Himself.

"You have stolen my heart, my sister, my bride. You have stolen my heart with one glance of your eyes, with one jewel of your neckless."

Song of Songs 4:9 

I am flawless in His sight. (Song of Songs 4:7)

I am the bride of Christ. (Revelation 19:7, 21:9)

I am holy, clean, and radiant, without stain, wrinkle, or blemish. (Ephesians 5:25-27)

I am one with Christ. (Ephesians 5:31-32)
I am called by name, and I am His. (Isaiah 43:1)

Get lost

Sometimes I try so so hard to find answers to things, to have it all figured out, to see the path that sits before me. But what I am continuing to learn is that

I have to get lost, in order to truly be found.

Get lost. In the Lord, in Scripture, in His promises to me, in the identity He speaks over me.
Get lost. Forgetting what I "know" and moving into the unknown, the wilderness.

"Therefore I am now going to allure her; I will lead her into the wilderness and speak tenderly to her." Hosea 2:14

Get lost. In the mystery of who you are and what You have done in my life.
Get lost. In the identity YOU have placed on me.
Get lost. In the purpose You have set before me.
Get lost. In the peace that only You can bring.
Get lost. In Your Word, being filled in the knowledge and truth that it brings.
Get lost. In a relationship with You where I am fully known, fully understood, fully loved.

Lead on daddy. Take me into the wilderness. To places unknown. To places of discomfort and pain. I want to get lost in You and with You. For you are

               "El Roi" - the God who sees me.

Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from Your presence?

Psalm 139:7

As I continue to dig deeper into who You are, I discover more and more about who You say that I am. The further I get lost in you, the more I come to find my sense of purpose and the truth about who I really am.